Love is a universal feeling. Many people hide behind the word love to use it as manipulation and as a result it has lost meaning and value. What merits unconditional love? By definition unconditional means. We often hear people state that they want a love that is unconditional…a love that knows no boundaries, but what does that look like. Should I turn the other cheek when you are doing wrong? Do I sit back and allow you to become an addict? Maybe I should allow you to harm or disrespect me because that is what is unconditional. Also by definition unconditional love means caring about the happiness of another person without any thought for what we might get for ourselves In essence unconditional love can be very unhealthy for both parties. I am a firm believer that love should have conditions. I should love myself enough to show another person how to love me. Maybe we should ask for an judgement free love. This would be a love that has boundaries but not judgment. In essence, I will love you through whatever situation but I will also be your accountability partner. True love will not be blind. I cannot say that I love you and allow you to self-destruct. The bible talks about love in depth and I believe that this is the true definition of love without judgement. It reads:
Love suffereth long, and is kind; love envieth not; charity is not vain of itself, it is not puffed up,
Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
KJV 1 Corinthians 13:4-13
In other words love can heal all as long as it is concrete kind of love; truthful, an honest. So the next times someone talks to you about unconditional love, just suggest a love that is free from judgement but wrapped in truth and see how it work out.