Everyone has needs in a relationship. If you or your partner feels unfulfilled in your relationship, it could be that you aren’t meeting each others’ needs. Just realizing that your partner has needs, and that they really do need to be filled can help you identify where you can work on your relationship.
Dr. Willard Harley, Jr. suggests these ten needs that every one has:
1. Sexual Fulfillment
2. Recreational Companionship
3. An Attractive Spouse
4. Domestic Support
5. Admiration
6. Affection
7. Conversation
8. Honesty and Openness
9. Financial Commitment
10. Family Commitment
Look at the list and put the in order so that the ones most important to you come first. Then have your partner do the same. Compare lists with your partner. Are you surprised? Maybe you honestly didn’t realize how important it is to him that you play tennis with him. Have you been getting your needs met outside the relationship? Is that friend at work just such a better listener than your spouse? By being the one to meet your partners needs, you can help keep your relationship safe from affairs.
To read more, check out His Needs, Her Needs by Dr. Willard Harley, Jr. in our Amazon Store.

Melissa is currently a Masters of Family Therapy student at Texas Woman’s University supervised by Megan R. Lee, LPC-S. She graduated from Hiram College with a Bachelor of Arts in Philosophy. She is scheduled to graduate with her Master’s Degree in August, 2014.