While marriage can be the most pleasurable experience, it can also be the most painful. It breaks my heart that almost half of all marriages end in divorce. An extramarital affair is the most detrimental event to a marriage and for the most part the hardest to treat. Going through the aftermath of adultery is like having to grieve for a death of a loved one. It is important to allow time to grieve whether you decide to stay or leave. It is also important to get professional help. Invite God to help you in the healing process. The Bible says that the Holy Spirit washes us with the water of the Word. The Bible is His Word. Start allowing the Lord to wash over you with healing as your begin to read the Bible. The Word of God states that His ear is attentive to your cry (Psalm 34:15) so He will comfort you (Isaiah 66:13). Turn to Him as you face this difficult phase in your life because there is nothing impossible with God. He will always work on the behalf of a person who trusts in Him and is trying to do the right thing. Give us a call so that we can help you in the healing process as well.
Everyone looks forward to special gestures in their marriage. If you stop feeling like doing them or if they don’t happen very often, this may be a sign. At the start of an anger cycle the willingness and interest in doing favors, or treating your spouse and special ways stops. If your spirit of generosity feels bankrupt it may show up in other places in your marriage, seeming unintentional.Example: “we used to watch TV together almost every night, but I’ve been too busy to do that for a while.”
It may also feel like you have a valid excuse for the change in behavior.Example: “My husband never used a mind me hanging out with my girls, but now he’s always checking up on me when I do. I told him where I was going, I don’t have to keep checking in with him.”
Whether the decrease is intentional or seems unintentional, or purposeful, when you stop indulging, pampering and pleasing each other, when you stop treating each other carefully and gently, you are most likely feeling the pain of disappearing goodwill.