A few months back I remember reading an article about this dress that was causing mass hysteria over its color.  Some individuals saw the blue and black.  Others saw gold and white.  How is this dress (which happens to be one and the same) have two different sets of colors?  Personally, I saw the blue and black.  However, when I viewed the dress from another angle, I noticed the white and gold.  So, what does the dress have to do with perspective?  Everything.

How we see things and comprehend things makes up our world — our perspective.  Others may not share the same view, thoughts, feelings, etc. and that is okay.  They have their perspective.  Sometimes we may feel frustration towards our spouse because they see the same thing differently – money, time, goals.  It’s when these frustrations are not being addressed and turn into resentment that perspectives may be dangerous.  To understand one’s perspective, simply take a step out of your shoes and place on their boots, heels, flats for a minute.  How do they view the situation?  What are their thoughts and frustrations?  When we open up our perspective to see another person’s view, we become more understanding and sometimes empathic.

One of the biggest eye openers I have mentioned to some of my male clients is this: You come home from working 8-12 hours a day at an exhausting job that underpays the amount of work that you do.  You drive through unbearable 8AM and 5PM traffic five days out of the week.  Your first thought is to sit in front of the TV to relax for a few minutes – without interruptions.  Your wife and children are ready to ask you questions, make requests, etc.  You get frustrated that they are not able to understand the hardships that you are going through in order to make the family stay afloat.  Guess what… they probably do.  Do you, as a husband, understand the hardships that your wife may be going through with taking care of the children 24/7, cooking, cleaning, transporting, etc.  When do they find time to have a lunch break, traffic, or TV break without children?  A housewife practically can’t even use the restroom without an interruption.

The point is this: When we understand another person’s perspective, we are then able to move towards a common goal/agreement.  We will have more sympathy (and maybe even some empathy) towards the other person.  When we are able to step out of our own world and examine other people’s point of views, we are then able to understand others better.

Until next time, be blessed.

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