I remember watching a very well known movie called the Best Man. This movie had a follow up episode about 13 years later. The plot of the movie was dealing with “things of the past.” The groom found out right before his wedding that his best man and wife to be, had a sexual encounter when they all attended college. It caused quite a chaos between the three of them. Through out it all, the marriage still took place. However, we find out in the second sequel “Best Man Holiday” that it has been 15 years and the husband is still not over the fling.
For some this scenario will not apply. But for many, it is a truth that is being dealt with to this day. How many times have you discovered something about your spouse, fiance’ or companion years and years after being into the relationship? What kind of things did you discover? And once you found out about these things, did you really want to know? Yes, there are some things that couples should discuss before committing to a relationship. These things include but are not limited to; medical conditions, previous children outside the relationship, careers and career interest, financial stability or instability, criminal background, religious beliefs, sex and sexual preferences, previous marriages, etc. But even discussing all these things we have to be open to the fact that everything about a person is not going to be revealed up front.
The truth of the matter is that there are some things you need to know, some things you think you want to know, and some things you truly do not need to know. Just realize that everyone has a past. When you marry them, you marry them for who you believe they are. However, you just don’t marry that person. You marry everything about them. You don’t just marry John or Judy. Some days John or Judy will turn to Heckle, Jeckle, and occasionally Mr. Hyde. The truth of the matter is that no matter how long you think you know a person, you will never truly know their entirety. If something does surface and sometimes it will. Put forth the effort to deal with it appropriately and move on. There is nothing wrong with wanting to know the truth. For we all want truth. The question is can you handle the truth?