30-Day Sex Challenge Part II!!!

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Last week I shared a religious perspective to the 30-Day Sex Challenge. To recap, a Florida pastor challenged the married members to have sex for 30 days with their spouse and asked the single members to abstain from sex for 30 days. The purpose of the assignment is to enhance the couple’s relationship with one another as well as their union with God. Naturally, I became intrigued by this topic and did further research. I figured there are many wives who can and have come up with several reasons to not have sex and this does not even have to be daily…. long day at work, dealing with the kids, yada yada yada….. 30 days seems like a long time…especially if you are looking at this challenge as a task. Once I began to read and understand the reasoning for the challenge, my perception of it being “the task of the day” changed. How far are you willing to go to strengthen your relationship with your spouse/significant other? This week I want to share what occurred when a wife proposed this challenge to her husband. The article was written by Ryan Buxton on HuffPost Live, titled:

What Happened When My Husband And I Had Sex Every Day For A Month

After a Reddit post claiming to be a spreadsheet of all the excuses a wife gave her husband to get out of sex went viral last week, HuffPost Live’s Caitlyn Becker hosted a panel of women who discussed how marriage changes intimacy. One of the panelists had quite the success story.

Megan Conley talked about her blog post called Five Reasons You Should Have Sex With Your Husband Every Day, and while she told HuffPost Live that the post’s title was “kind of facetious” because it’s more about being intimate daily than actually having sex, she said she was committed to that idea in her own marriage.

“I go and work out every single day. I go to Zumba and humiliate myself in front of 45 women every single day because I decided my body is worth it and I’d like to wear a swimsuit at some point, so why can’t I put 15 minutes a day toward my relationship?” Conley said. And her spouse was more than willing to oblige. It was this challenge that my husband very happily accepted, so we decided to do that for a month, and sometimes it was 15 minutes and sometimes it was several hours, and it was fantastic,” she said. More frequent sex improved their relationship not only physically, but emotionally was well. Conley said that when her father died in February, she and her husband’s dutiful work on their relationship allowed them to “see each other’s souls” and communicate openly to help Conley heal. “As a woman, when I saw sex as something that strengthened my relationship, it became much more interesting to me,” she said.

In this challenge, although they did not have intercourse daily, they were intimate with one another, thus strengthening their bond to one another. I ALWAYS have something to do but I agree if I can find the time to go jog three to four times a week, I can put forth a little more effort in making time for my relationship!!!

 

DIY Project: How to Build the Foundation for a Perfect Love Story

DIY Project_How to Build the Foundation For a Perfect Love Story
DIY PROJECT: How to Build the Foundation for a Perfect Love Story

The following ingredients are needed for this DIY project and can be found in a local bible near you at 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 
1 cup of Patience
¾ cup of Kindness
2 cups of Rejoicing
1-2 cups of Trust
1-2 cups of Forgiveness
4 cups of Belief
3 cups of Hope
2 cups of Endurance

First, understand that there is a mixture we have to make for the foundation to be smooth enough to be laid.

Step 1: Begin with 1 cup of patience with yourself and 1 cup of patience with your partner. You were both created with flaws. There will be mistakes made and mountains to overcome and this ingredient will help tremendously in the long run.

Step 2: Use your brush to stir in a ¾ cup of kindness in the mixture. Be gentle with your words, your actions, your heart, and with your partner’s heart. Go out of your way, matter of fact, get out of your way and be kind to one another.

Step 3: This a BIG step- the elimination step, also known as the purging. This process may take some time and could be on-going. You ready? Purge that full cup of envy, which I never told you to grab! Hating Facebook, your partner’s job, or family because it takes some of your partner’s attention won’t do you any good. Have faith that his/her heart belongs to you. Boastfulness, you know, telling your partner all that you have sacrificed will only make him/her feel bad. So if you love your partner, eliminating this won’t be a problem. And that pint of Arrogance or rudeness will only crack the foundation that you are trying to build. So let’s get rid of that too! Oh and don’t forget the importance of getting rid of your ½ cup of stubbornness-you know insisting your own way. It will ruin this project! Next, throw the ¾ cup of wrongdoing in the trash– lies and cheating don’t belong here!

Step 4: Throw out the record of wrongdoings of the past. Let go of the resentment that slowly crept its way into the mixture.

Step 5: Once you have completed Step 4, pour in 2 cups of rejoicing in the truth of God’s glory and your union! Focus on and remind each other of the good qualities and times.

Step 6: Now are you ready for the restoration? Pour in trust and forgiveness are an essential for this project, I would say you need at least 1-2 cup of each.

Step 7: Do know that this foundation will bear a heavy load at times. Therefore, be understanding and 3 cups of believe in this mixture will help you understand that if you followed the instructions carefully, it will hold up the weight of every pound that is put on it.

Step 8: 2 cups of hope are essential as you encounter obstacles. Hope is the ingredient that will help reduce wear and tear.

Step 9: Protect the foundation: physically and mentally, with 1 more cup of belief. Another cup of hope because it’s going to help keep the foundation sturdy, and 2 cups of endurance no matter the stakes.

Step 10: Now keep stirring this mixture until it’s smooth. When you are ready, lay down the foundation mixture and let GOD continue to build the house.

Blog inspired by: GOD 
Love is patience. Love is kind. Love does not envy or boast. Love is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insists its own way. Love is not irritable or resentful. Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing. Love rejoices in truth. Love bears all things. Love believes all things. Love hopes all things. Love endures all things -1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

What your man really needs…

What your man really needs

 

I just came across this story that I wanted to share with all of you from Marriage Today by Pastor Jimmy Evans…

A couple that has been married for 30 years and are madly in love got up to share their testimony about marriage. The woman stunned everyone as she opened up her testimony with what a lousy husband she had when she got married. She went on to share that he did not know how to manage money, was never home, and was insensitive to her needs. He never prayed either. As she spoke these terrible details about her husband, he just stood there smiling the whole time. The audience had no idea where she was taking them. After saying all of this, the woman looked at the audience and shared about the choices she had to make. She knew she could nag him and try to change him. She could make the decision to leave him, but in her heart she knew that none of those things were right. So what did she do?

She decided to let him fail so that God could correct him and work on him. In that process she honored him and loved him. In the time she spent praying for him she began to see God changing her husband before her eyes. Her husband stood next to her proudly a completely different man then the one she married.  She shared that her husband did not get that way because she nagged him or demanded that he change. He got that way because his wife treated him with respect.

This is not to say that we cannot share our disagreements with our spouses, but the key words are kindness and respect. Treat him the way you want to be treated. Honor him and pray for him. Don’t nag. Don’t become manipulative. You may win a few battles with those tactics, but you’ll always lose the war.

A man’s greatest need is to be honored ladies, especially when it comes from you. If you honor him even when he knows he doesn’t deserve it, God will use it in a powerful way. He will deepen your husband’s love for you as He changes your husband’s heart. Progress is not made by dishonoring a person or trying to force them to change. The only way to do it is through prayer and treating them better than they deserve.

Submission in the Marriage…

FFC image Submission in Marriage

I have been married for 14 years come November 27th of this year.  I love my wife and I love my marriage. However, it has not always been “smooth sailing.”  In other words, it has not always been easy.  Marriage is work!  It will only work if the two individuals put in work.  I must say that my wife and I each give 100 percent plus to ensure that our marriage is successful.  It may sound like a lot but its actually not.  Along with our Christian faith, we discovered a technique that makes being married easy. This technique is nothing new.  It has actually always been available.  It is called “submission.”  You see, in order for a marriage to be successful, both people have to be willing to submit to one another in the fear of God (Ephesians 5:21).  It is not just one person submitting, but both.  Well what is submission?  Submission is not just doing for one another.  It is actually doing for one another what you really don’t want to but… you do it because it is the right thing to do.  The bible teaches us many things.  One of the most profound things that it teaches is the power of submission.  If we submit first to God, then to our marriage, and even to certain situations, we will find out that not only will our marriage become better, but life in general will become better.  Don’t get me wrong.  Submission is not an easy thing to do.  However, it is attainable.  Start today and make submission in your marriage  your will.  Decide that you are going to submit.  After all, what do you have to lose, besides your marriage… Selah.

Fake Marijauna

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I recently received a message on Facebook about a young teenage boy on life support after smoking K2 synthetic marijuana for the first time and now he’s brain dead. This sent me into an immediate panic because I have 2 nephews around the same age as this teen whom I often have drug prevention talks with. I immediately did my research on the synthetic drug craze and realized this would be a great blog post.  Most of my research came from WebMD, K2drugfacts and addiction support internet pages.

Fake Marijuana also known as K2, Spice, Blaze and Mr. Smiley is a dangerous synthetic drug that is afflicting and killing our youth today. According to WebMD, Synthetic marijuana is made by blending plants and herbs including bay bean, blue lotus, and red clover. These ingredients are sprayed with a chemical that gives it its marijuana-like effects in the brain.

When smoked or ingested, these drugs produce a similar high to marijuana. Until recently, these compounds were sold in gas stations and convenience stores. The Drug Enforcement Administration has banned five chemicals found in Spice and K2, but people may still be able to find these substances on the Internet.

Parents and teens need to be aware of the signs and symptoms of synthetic marijuana use and know that it is out there.  Synthetic marijuana or K2 as it is also known by, is readily available to almost anyone with access to a convenience store. Even though there are stern warnings from many medical journals about K2’s side effects, people continue to smoke it. What many people don’t know is, the side effects are sometimes very bad and can even result in death.

Some of the most commonly reported side effects of K2 are:

Extreme Paranoia
Hallucinations
Anxiety
Temporary Paralysis of Motor Skills
Elevated Heart Rate
Uncontrollable Sweating
High Body Temperature
Manic Rage
Delusions
Seizures
Vomiting
Rapid Heart Rate
Stroke
Death

Many teens may be drawn to these drugs because they are so easy to come by and can’t be detected in drug tests. The American Association of Poison Control Centers reported 4,500 calls involving them since 2010.

30-Day Sex Challenge!!!

Surfing the web this week….I came up with this interesting topic, having sex with your spouse for a month. As a woman, naturally I was intrigued because I have never had sex with my spouse for 30 consecutive days in a row. Giving it further thought, I began to wonder how many married women have. As I read these articles I began to subconsciously come up with reasons why I could never complete such a task but the more I read to more I realized it’s not just about SEX!!! Every article defined this challenge as strengthening the emotional connection between couples and should not be viewed as a task. Although the challenge assignments (so to speak) changed from site to site, the end result remained the same. Over the next few weeks I will be sharing the challenges I found most interesting:

From a religious point of view my first thought in regards to sex is procreation purposes….”Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). However this is not the sole purpose. Spouse’s are to submit to one another to aid in strengthening a physical and emotional bond…”The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (1 Corinthians 7:3-5).

The first article was published on the CBS website back in 2008.

Pastor Issues “30- Day Sex Challenge”

The pastor of a southwest Florida church opened many eyes and ears Sunday when he said he wants married couples in the congregation to — have sex for 30 days in a row. Oh — and he wants singles to steer clear of such frolicking for the same length of time. Head pastor Paul Wirth of Relevant Church in Ybor City, outside Tampa, says his “30-Day Sex Challenge” is one way of taking on the nation’s 50-percent divorce rate. “About ten years ago,” With explained on The Early Show Wednesday, “my wife (of 18 years) and I were struggling in our marriage, and we realized that we needed something that was going to help us in our marriage, and we found this information from Dr. Willard Harley about learning each others’ emotional needs. And we began to study it and apply it to our marriage, and it revolutionized our marriage, and we know that, you know, God is the one who talks about love and authors love, and he knows that he wants us to be intimate and connected with each other on a daily basis.” Wirth told CBS News he believes most people go into marriage “without really knowing each other emotionally, without knowing their partner’s emotional needs, and this (the challenge) is a way for people to discover their greatest needs — both married and non-married couples.” He cited a recent study out that found that 20 million Americans who are married have sex fewer than 10 times a year. “People’s jobs, houses, kids and other things get in the way,” he says. “I think men really need to reevaluate their wife’s needs. We so often come home and kick off our shoes and pick up the remote and don’t offer to help with dinner, don’t offer to help with the kids — and then we just expect fireworks in the bedroom. But we need to meet (our wives’ needs) on intimate levels.” The reaction has been “overwhelmingly positive,” Wirth says. “Both married and single members are excited about it. My wife has fielded a bunch of e-mails saying that it’s opened a line of communication in some marriages that they haven’t had since they were married.” Among the couples taking part: congregants Doug and Lorena Webber. “We’re sitting in church one day, and we heard about this challenge,” Doug told Early Show co-anchor Harry Smith, “and we said, ‘That’s perfect. We can do anything for 30 days!’ And the more you dig into it, we’re, like, ‘We can certainly do this for 30 days! ‘ ” Lorena says, “We’re just trying to figure out a way to meet each others’ emotional needs, and that’s the biggest thing about this. It’s more than physical. It’s about getting to know each other again.” “It’s much more than the physical aspect,” Doug agreed, “so, it’s really helping us refocus on our marriage.”

Who’s up for the challenge?